Saying goodbye to babyhood

It’s the end of an era. Or something less dramatic. But the time has come to stop breastfeeding Liam. Many of you may be thinking, geez you’re still breastfeeding that kid?! Well, long and short is.. yes. Several months ago I easily weaned him down to once a day. We were able to substitute his morning nursing with a warm sippy cup of milk with honey. And then any time he would sign “milk” and pull at my shirt during the day, I would again get his cup of milk or water and distract him with a book, puzzle, or truck. So we were down to just once a day. But the nighttime feed seems to be here to stay. It has just been so easy to let him nurse for a few minutes, fall asleep in my arms, and then place him in his crib, where he proceeds to sleep through the night until 8 or 8:30 the next day. I selfishly had a fear that by giving up the bedtime nursing, I would lose the happy sleepy baby that lets this mama get 9 hours of uninterrupted sleep at night. So yes as of this post, I am still breastfeeding my sasquatch child. But that is all about to change. After a lengthy discussion with my fertility doctor this morning, it was determined that I need to stop breastfeeding Liam in order to move forward with any further fertility treatment.

For those of you who have been pregnant while nursing, or tandem nursed two children,  I know what you are going to say. Yes it is safe and yes it can be done. But for a thirty-five year old with “diminished egg reserve” who is ready for baby number two and seeking very expensive fertility assistance, I want to make sure I eliminate any tiny little thing that could cause things to go wrong. And in some cases breast feeding can lower your prolactin levels. And (sorry if this next part is TMI but we might be past TMI by this point) my doctor said my uterine lining looks thin which could be due to lower prolactin levels. And ya gots to have that thick plump uterus for baby making. (Or so I’ve been told).

And so now, before his baby sibling has even been born, poor Liam is having to learn the lesson of sacrificing for your younger sibling. A lesson, as both a younger and an older sister, I am all too familiar with. Nineteen months that started out as the most awkward, painful, and frustrating part of motherhood turned into the sweetest, calmest part of our day and it is now coming to an end. Each day Liam is acting and looking more and more like a toddler and less like a baby. The few remaining bits of his “baby-hood” seem to be quickly fading away.  Besides the fact that he still craps in his pants, he will have no more “baby” left in him. (And lets face it, that doesn’t count because nobody is sad when the days of poopy diapers come to an end).  But I know it will be the right decision. And not just for future baby number two, but for all of us.

So all that being said, with the exception of literally leaving Liam for a week and letting him cry himself to sleep with someone else, I have no idea how this is going to work. Any tips or recommendations for night weaning a 19 month old?? I am up for trying just about everything. Leave a comment below, I would love to hear what everyone has tried!!

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